I went through a particularly awkward phase in 4th grade where if I did not wash my hair every day it would get really oily. I was extremely self-conscious and yet still lacking in discipline so I suffered through many a "bad hair day". I was also in the "dumb class" that year. When I got placed in the that class I was confused, I hadn't realized I was dumb until that point. The popular kids were in the "smart class". The dumb class was taught be a mean old fat woman named Mrs. Carpenter. I will never forget the stretch violet polyester pants she wore several times a week. They had this big seam running down the center of each pant leg and hugged her ass like a second skin.
At that time my Mom left for work early and I was responsible for getting myself up, showered and to school on time. One day the inevitable happened. I got up late for school, did not have time to shower (second day in a row) and I had to run to school. Thinking quick, I grabbed my navy blue hoodie on my way out the door. The plan was perfect. I could simply wear the hood up all day with the ties pulled tight in a bow under my chin and nobody would be the wiser.
I ran most of the way to school, barely making it to my seat in time for the bell. I sat there panting and heaving, completely out of breath, red faced, sweaty, oily and hot. Before I could catch my breath, Mrs. BigAsaCar says,
"You will have to take that hood off now."
"Why?" I asked.
"It's bothering Denise."
I look over at the little prick Denise. He looks at me and laughs.
My heart stops.
I start a new round of sweating.
I feel my face burn.
My hands slowly reach for the tie and pull, I gently unstick the hood from my head. I look down, waiting for the moment to pass.
I want to die.
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